Living in Peace

  This year has been off to a rough start.

Having celebrated my birthday a few weeks ago, I saw life flash before me while traveling, brought into a unjustified lawsuit and now news that my father is in the hospital with multiple internal organs shutting down. Add all the other family events that have taken place and the feuds between family members and you have one messed up family.

The news I received this week about my father got me thinking about how short life really is and that we cannot continue to hold grudges or push family aside. This week Pastor Mark spoke about the agony and brutal death our Lord and Savior went through to save us. Pastor Mark stated in his message that forgiven people forgive and further stated revenge will always destroy, although it may not destroy its intended target someone or something will get destroyed when we hold onto the past.

Sadly I must say my relationship with my father has not been a good one. I have not seen my father for several months and furthermore, I/we have not spoken to each other since last June. When I learned about my father’s condition, it was not from my mother or from my sister; it was from my wife who learned about the problem during the day. Wow, talk about a plank striking you in the face. I was so angry and torn up by the problems of the past and our strained relationships not to mention my mother or sister calling me to tell me about the problem with my father.

I must not place full blame on them as I had written a letter expressing my frustrations this past summer and they were taking this to heart and were also torn up about not calling me. I chose to get up early on Thursday to drive across town to see my father and make peace with him so that we both could feel the peace should my father not pull through this very serious condition. I spent most of the day with my mother, father and sister while hearing various medical professionals come into the room and tell us that on paper my father was a dead man yet he was sitting in the bed talking with us and carrying on a good conversation.

HMMMMM, who do think made all this possible? God....

They drive home was a long one and I was able to speak with my sons and let them know that even I may have failed them in their lifetime however wanted them to know how I love them an want nothing more than to see our family restored before something happens to any of our loved ones.

Life is way too short to hold onto the past and allow revenge to get the victory, we do not know when we might take our last breaths or what roads we might take in the meantime however we must be prepared and I thank god I had this chance with my father yesterday.
I do not think that we often look at the big picture when we say, write or do things to each other. The good news is we can make amends because we have been forgiven. In the Lord's prayer we say forgive us as we forgive those. Is this really what we want our Lord to do to us or do we really want to show His love and forgiveness and say forgive as we forgive?

I do not believe life is full of coincidences. I believe God is placed circumstances in our lives that allow us to reflect on how we respond to others or react to situations. The bottom line is do I want to honor God or honor another person by what I do or say?

Enough is enough and it is time to focus on God and live like he has called me to do.

Saturday evening Vicki and I had dinner with some friends that we have known for a number of years.  In 1988 I was headed home from an off duty assignment when I came upon a horrible accident involving a car versus motorcycle in Phoenix.  I did not realize the motorcycle was a police motorcycle and the Sergeant involved was Gary.

The paramedics had not arrived and the Sergeant was severely injured in fact, I thought he was dead.  As the paramedics arrived they worked very hard to save Gary and rushed him to the local hospital where he was treated and hospitalized.  Gary was told he would never walk or talk or even be able to see again because the accident caused him to receive a severe head injury.  

In 1989 while dating Vicki, I began to visit the church where Vicki was attending and to my surprise I saw Gary and his wife Jan. I was so excited to see that God had allowed this man to walk again and restore his vision and realized what a positive attitude he had toward life.  Through the years we became good friends. Gary retired and moved to Colorado and we continued to maintain the friendship through the years. 

When ever we would talk with Gary and ask him how he was doing he always answered with a long positive saying. Gary would always see the positive in all the things he did or even situations we shared with each other. I learned that Gary had not only been involved in the accident I saw but that was his third accident and God had been working in strong ways through Gary.  After many years and visits, we eventually lost track of each other however we never stopped thinking about our families. 

Fast forward to this Christmas.  We received a card in the mail from Gary and Jan and the card had their contact information.  We were able to reconnect and catch up on the lost time.  Sadly we found out that Gary has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and the disease is very aggressive.  Jan told us that Gary would still recognize us however he might not put the name to the face.

Gary and Jan were passing through visiting family and we were able to see each other Saturday evening.  It really hurts seeing someone you have known to know through a tragic accident and consider one you love and care very much for to suffer from such a disease. Gary was very animated as he was in the past however he reminded me of the movie character Rainman. Gary kept saying over and over to me, Vicki and Jan, "So what do you think Jan" and various other little phrases.  Gary was still positive despite the illness and really made me think about the quality of life that he is living and will this be the last time we see Gary?

Why is it we take life for granted and think our friends are disposal or throw our loved ones to the curb while we pursue other avenues at the cost of friendships or saying or doing hurtful things to each other?

Gary taught me a long time ago about being positive and living life as if today is the last breath you might take.  We can not continue to say or do hurtful things to each other and claim to love Jesus or claim that all is well within our soul if we are not loving our neighbor like He commanded. 

I know that Gary recognized us last evening and even though he was struggling, he kept smiling and kept us thinking as we sat with each other.  As we left we shook hands and hugged each other like we always did.  Gary even said "some day I will be better than I ever was".  WOW....what an attitude. 

Thanks Gary and may God be with you and Jan. 
 

Questions

I (Vicki) have been thinking about how short life is. Perhaps because Brian's birthday is this week.  Perhaps because we had dinner with some friends, one who has Altzheimers (Brian will blog more on this later).  Perhaps because I have been deeply wounded by someone I love more than life itself. 

Why do we who profess to love Jesus then hurt each other?  Why do we not realize each breath we take is a gift from God?  Life is short, it could end at any moment.  Do I want to go to Heaven with unresolved issues?

Why do we not cherish each and every moment with those we love?  Why do we use words to hurt the people we love the most?  Why don't we laugh more?  Why don't we love unconditionally?

What can I do to make those around me better people?  How can I show my Jesus' unconditional love?  What can I do to show Jesus to a world in desperate need?

Pretty deep thoughts.  Not sure where God is leading me, but I am quite excited to see how this thought process will bring glory to Him.

God is so amazing!!